Celebrations in West Belfast as Alex converts to Protestantism

There were joyous scenes on the Shankill Road when a spokesman for Almaty Athletic midfield enforcer Alex O'Donovan announced that he had renounced his Catholic faith and converted to Protestantism. The spokesman vigorously denied that peer pressure was a factor in this stunning u-turn.

"I can assure you that Alex is very much his own man, and takes his spiritual well-being very seriously. This decision has come after careful consideration and stark reflection. Any suggestion that this has come about because Dawson and Nige wouldn't go boozing with him are utterly baseless and unfounded," the spokesprod continued.

Sources indicate that O'Donovan has long been dissatisfied with the direction of the Catholic Church. An insider, speaking on the condition of anonymity, denied that the Church's controversial position on pre-marital sex was a factor, indicating that since Ant's stag, this has not been an issue. The pal continued to say that the main reason was likely to be the more relaxed Protestant Sunday service which does not require participants to kneel. O'Donovan is said to believe that the switch can prolong his career by at least 2 years thanks to the reduced load on his knees...










Alex (second from left) and friends