Week 8: AA 6 Below Average Joes 1

Almaty Close Gap after Stunning Revenge Mission
Still bruised after last week’s narrow defeat to table toppers, Viscount, Almaty took the field against the only other team to defeat them in the opening round of games with revenge very much on their minds. Axel Foley returned to the squad after prolonged hamstring trouble to replace the injured Spratt. Apart from that the AA’s line out had a decidedly settled look about it; and it showed from the start. Below Average Joes, so fluid and quick in week one, were a shadow of the side that delivered that particular hammering. Or perhaps it was the case that AA, chastened from the defeat, have learned the lessons that were on offer.
Either way AA started well and were one up within 10 minutes as “Tricks” Galvin, in his first meaningful contribution, won the ball in midfield, broke away from a flat footed defense and slotted the ball past a hapless keeper. AA continued to press and doubled their advantage when a driven cross-field pass from Jimmy “Lamps” Butler found Gav “Crouchy” Jeffery, who controlled and finished brilliantly. With AA in control, and BAJs clearly rattled by their inability to respond, the game took a nasty turn as a self styled “Maradona” reacted badly to an Alex “Ballack” O’Donovan tackle. “Ballack”, on a warning for a previous misdemeanor, would spend five minutes in the bin for his latest offence. But nothing could excuse “Maradona’s” response as he senselessly lunged at “Ballack” with the shoulder. A disgraceful 12 man brawl ensued (actual punches: zero; actual soccer style “hold me back” histrionics: 12). With calm restored, both teams were reduced to 5 men for a five minute period. On another day though, “Maradona”, would have seen red, and in this regard referees must be given more leeway to use their common sense. What we need is consistency at the end of the day.
The second half began where the first had ended and it was no surprise when “Ballack” O’Donovan, back on the pitch after his part in the first half melee, added to his season’s tally with a deflected shot. A brief and uncharacteristic spot of lazy defending saw BAJ reduce the deficit to 3-1 but AA were not to be denied as they found another gear to comfortably put paid to any lingering BAJ hopes of an unlikely comeback. The fourth came from “Crouchy”, who finished superbly from a tight angle after the keeper had saved well from a powerful left footed drive from “Axel” Foley. “Lamps” Butler bagged the fifth form an even tighter angle after an elaborate free kick routine on the edge of the area saw “Tricks” dummy and “JT” Espey fire wide from the ensuing shot only to find “Lamps” in space on the end line. An excellent finish was marred for the second week running by a ridiculous celebration which saw “Lamps” skip, clap, and congratulate himself, in one horrifying moment of madness. As goal celebrations continue to spiral into the extravagant referees really will have to start clamping down on this sort of behaviour from such roll models.
A wonderful Zidane from “Tricks” saw him once again break away from a now dispirited BAJ defense. This time he released “Crouchy” who completed his hat-trick, and the rout, to make it 6-1.
AA spirits were lifted still further as news filtered through of a surprise defeat for Viscount. So the gap is now three and the probability of a final day showdown grows ever more likely. Hansen’s opening day of the season jibe that “you’ll never win anything with unfit overweight alcoholic granddads” is beginning to look more and more ridiculous with every passing game…

Week 7: AA 0 Viscount 2

AA's fans left the stadium Wed night with heavy hearts after a two nil defeat to the league leaders, Viscount.

The game was very combative with both teams given each other very little time on the ball. AA edged the first half but were guilty of wasting some precious chances. Most notably, after a superb through ball from James G, Spratt managed to get the ball caught under his feet when through one on one with the keeper. A slick move culminated in Billy finding Jim unmarked in the corner… alas the angle was too tight and the keeper made the save. Just before the break AA's Spratt collided with his fellow team-mates, Gav. A crack was heard and Spratt fell to the ground in pain. Unfortunately, for AA fans their enigmatic player/gaffer was unable to continue. After being well on top the lengthy delay for the injury destroyed AA's momentum.

Viscount kicked off the second half and a lapse of concentration resulted in the usually solid AA defence leaking a goal. AA battled hard and came close on a number of occasions but were denied by the Viscount keeper who picked up the man of the match award. Their best effort came from a bicycle kick from an agile Gav that just shaved the post. As AA surged forward in search of the vital equaliser they were punished by a soft goal. "Safehands" was beaten at his near post... apparently a streaker had distracted him!

There was further disappointment for the AA faithful yesterday as reports came through confirming that Spratt had indeed suffered a break to his hand; sidelining him for the next four games.

Week 6: AA 5 Fan of Canta 2

They say the mark of a top side is when they can grind out a win without playing well, and that was the case last night as Almaty Athletic won their fifth game on the bounce against a physical and at times ill-disciplined ‘Fan of Canta’… AA lined up in their usual 3-1-1 formation, with James G returning to the side in place of the missing Alex O’D.

AA started reasonably well but were wasteful in front of goal… typified by Jim “Lamps” Butler. At one stage, a sweeping ball across the width of the pitch was coming to me, I focused on the flight of the ball, picked my spot, concentrated on keeping it low, and started to pull the trigger… With my face locked in concentration, the ball was just about to arrive and I was poised to make contact… “HAVE A SHOT JIM!” shouted Gav… What the f*ck?!?!?! And the ball was shanked wide… cheers Gav!

Unfortunately there’s no excuse for the free kick debacle… the plan was to bend it in the 6 inch gap between the wall and the post with the outside of the right boot… so what if the ball was wider than 6 inches! So what if Gav had an open goal square of me! Instead, well, you know the rest…

There was also another attempt on ‘goal’ which went out for a throw in (and the ball into the car park), and their keeper decided to make one decent save when I was through on goal … all in all, classic “Lamps”…
\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\> \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\>Anyway, enough about me… AA broke with\ntradition this week and actually scored first, James G finding the net… Sorry\nJames, can’t remember the goal… Fan of Canta huffed and puffed but\ndidn’t create much. Ant was marshalling the defence, and made sure we\nkept tight to ‘Number 19’. AA had a few trademark breaks and slick\nmoves, but in general we were dragged down to their level. Fan of Canta then scored\nout of nothing when a long throw caught out the defence and with Safehands\nstranded, ‘Number 19’ was on hand to slot home.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\>\u003cbr\>\nAA are made of stern stuff however and we kept to the gameplan. We managed to\nget back in front before the interval, Gav rediscovering his goalscoring touch\nafter an erratic display in front of goal last week (specifically, that header\nover the bar from 1 yard!). He looked lovely in his United top too it must be\nsaid! 2-1 at half time. \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\> \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\>In the second half, the game became very scrappy with\nsome heavy challenges going in by ‘Number 19’ and their lad in\nnavy. He got into a bit of trouble with the ref and in truth could have been\nsent off. The ref finally took action to stamp his authority on the game after\nyet another reducer by yer man on James G… by warning Safehands about\nkeeping his mouth shut!\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\> \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n\n\u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Arial\"\>\u003cspan lang\u003d\"EN-IE\" style\u003d\"font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial\"\>AA rose above it all though and killed the game. Gav\nfinished expertly into the corner after James G set him up. Next, James G and\nJim broke through, and though it went against every bone in his body, James G\nreluctantly decided against the drouble drag-back followed by the\nsidefoot-from-behind-the-other",1]
);
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Anyway, enough about me… AA broke with tradition this week and actually scored first, James G finding the net… Sorry James, can’t remember the goal… Fan of Canta huffed and puffed but didn’t create much. Ant was marshalling the defence, and made sure we kept tight to ‘Number 19’. AA had a few trademark breaks and slick moves, but in general we were dragged down to their level. Fan of Canta then scored out of nothing when a long throw caught out the defence and with Safehands stranded, ‘Number 19’ was on hand to slot home.
AA are made of stern stuff however and we kept to the game plan. We managed to get back in front before the interval, Gav rediscovering his goal scoring touch after an erratic display in front of goal last week (specifically, that header over the bar from 1 yard!). He looked lovely in his United top too it must be said! 2-1 at half time.

In the second half, the game became very scrappy with some heavy challenges going in by ‘Number 19’ and their lad in navy. He got into a bit of trouble with the ref and in truth could have been sent off. The ref finally took action to stamp his authority on the game after yet another reducer by yer man on James G… by warning Safehands about keeping his mouth shut!

AA rose above it all though and killed the game. Gav finished expertly into the corner after James G set him up. Next, James G and Jim broke through, and though it went against every bone in his body, James G reluctantly decided against the double drag-back followed by the sidefoot-from-behind-the-other -leg, instead squaring for a tap in for “Lamps” (who resisted the temptation to wheel away, cupping his ear at the section of supporters who had been on his back…) Incredibly, he did the same a few minutes later, Espey capping another superb performance with a goal.

All in all, a solid performance with the knowledge that there is plenty more in us. Attacking, James G with a goal and 3 assists did well, as did Gav with a brace. The defence coped with ‘Number 19’ who was everywhere… Safehands had a good game despite conceding a second at the death. One great save when the ball smacked his face…
Next week, the make or break clash with table-toppers Viscount.
Safehands Sweetnam
“Lamps”
Ant “Pick up Number 19!” Spratt
Keith “The Rock” Espey
Billy “Mr Dependable” Murphy
Tadhg “Tiger” McTadhg
James “G” Galvin
Gav “Have a shot Jim!” Jeffery

Week 5: AA 5 That’s Entertainment FC 1

Another week, another win…
Winning is a habit, or something, and Almaty have it pretty bad at the moment. This time, up against third placed “That’s Entertainment”, not even the concession of an early goal could stop the Almaty machine, as they brushed aside the challenge with a resounding 5-1 victory.
This week James “Tricks” Galvin was suffering from the drawbacks of being a dual-coder, inexplicably deciding to play with the egg chasers instead. Morgan “Axel” Foley, with ongoing hamstring trouble, was the other noticeable absentee. Jim “Djimi/Lamps” Butler and Billy “Dinny Irwin” Murphy were welcomed back into the fold after a week of “R&R” and Tadhg “Big Man” O’Connell also retained his place.
After it was pointed out that “these lads look a much better outfit than last week’s lot”, Almaty actually started tentatively. They were punished early when Jim “Djimi” Butler was caught dwelling on the ball at left back, conceding a needless corner. From the subsequent delivery, Almaty’s uncharacteristic inability to clear was punished with a fine finish.
Undeterred, Almaty grew into the game, and were level soon afterwards. Jim “Lamps” Butler, atoning for his earlier error, picked the ball up on the left and, from some distance, drove the ball high into the top right hand corner. An exceptional finish. From then until half time Almaty went on to play some of their best football of the season, with some sublime one and two touch stuff, with Alex “Ballack” O’Donovan as the pivot and Gav “Crouchy” Jeffery as the focal point up front. They were soon rewarded with fine finish from attacking right back Billy “Dinny Irwin” Murphy. Half time: 2-1 to Almaty.
The second half continued where the first had ended. Almaty took complete control as “That’s Entertainment”, reduced to speculative long ball tactics, wilted under the onslaught. Further goals from “Gaffer” Spratt, “Ballack” O’Donovan and Keith “JT” Espey gave Almaty an unassailable 5-1 lead. And it could have been more were it not for another handful of spurned chances, the most wasteful from “Crouchy” Jeffery, who somehow managed to head over an open goal from a couple of yards with the keeper no where in sight.
It’s now four wins on the bounce for Almaty and, with “JT” Espey marshalling a rock solid defense, “Ballack” O’Donovan providing the link in midfield and “Crouchy” continuing to offer magnet-like target up front, a title challenge is surely on the cards…

Week 4: AA 5 Kings of Neon 0

Having won their previous two games Almaty faced Kings of Neon last night in what was to be an important game in decide whether they would be in the hunt for Silverware come August. The squad was somewhat depleted this week with Jim "Sober-up" Butler rumoured to be recovering in a detox centre in Malta after a heavy June Bank Holiday weekend. All three of the Murphy brothers were also out of the equation due to various reasons. To compound matters Morgan "Axel" Foley failed a late fitness test. However, the squad was bolstered by the return of Espey after a two week spell out with an STD. Tadhg "Fat-man" O'Connell was also signed minutes before the transfer deadline.

The game started at a sluggish pace given the soaring temperatures. However, Almaty soon buckled down and started producing some quality football. As Almaty began to dominate possession frustration begun to creep in to Kings of Neon's game. Almaty's breakthrough came on the 13th minute. O'Donovan broke from midfield and put in a superb cross for Jeffery who got his shot in target but was denied by a hand ball. The eagle-eyed ref blew for a spotter which Jeffery converted with style and penance. Almaty soon doubled their lead when Spratt made a trade-mark run from the back and was played through by a perfectly waited pass by Galvin. Spratt took one touch and let rip with a low drive into the bottom corner; giving the keeper no chance! Just before the break Almaty were to extend their lead even further when O'Donovan beat two players and then rounded the keeper to finish a brilliant individual goal. However, there were some protestations from Neon's keeper who claimed to have been fouled.

Neon started the second half with some early pressure but some stout defending by O'Connell, Espey and Co. kept Neon's strikers at bay and gave "Safehands" Sweetnam nothing to do. Almaty created a hat-full of chances in the 2nd half but were only able to convert two of these. Espey got his first of the campaign when he hammered a ball against the post which then deflected against the crossbar and into the net. Some superb vision by "Safehands" meant that Galvin was released on the left. He then crossed for Jeffery who finished smartly to make it five. The crowd wanted six but unfortunately that was not to be.

The Gaffer was delighted with the performance and was quoted as saying "Excellent performance. Some brilliant football played. When we set a good pace and work hard there's no stopping us!"