As the season has progressed so has the length of Almaty’s injury list. Missing this week was top-scorer “Crouch” Jeffers and Morgan “Dead-Leg” Foley. Jim “Limps” Butler and Alex “I’m not 15 stone” O’Donovan were also doubtful but were listed in the squad as emergency substitutes. However, “Have a go” O’Connell was back from his week’s sojourn to Eastern Europe.
Almaty fans were in a state of shock as they saw their team concede two within the first 10 mins with no reply. The first came direct from a free kick – apparently “Safehands” Sweetnam got an A1 in his Leaving Cert for Honours Maths but this has been cast in doubt! The second came as “Big-man” O’Connell passed the ball direct to the That’s Entertainment striker who finished neatly. (O’Connell was subsequently checked for sun-stroke at half-time.)
“Gaffer” Spratt then introduced himself and managed to bag two goals to brings things level after he was played through twice by “Unselfish” Enright. They created a number of other chances but were denied by some great saves from That’s Entertainment’s keeper.
However, Almaty were to shoot themselves in the foot again (and literally for Jim “Limps” Butler as he had to go off injured) as Spratt took a throw-in; threw it to “Safehands” Sweetnam who then pondered before generously passing the ball to the That’s Entertainment striker. (Sweetnam was subsequently given a random breath-test at half-time.)
That’s Entertainment nearly scored again as a shot smashed off the cross-bar. Almaty leveled again with a neat goal from James Galvin with “Unselfish” Enright again the provider.
Things became heated at half-time with harsh words from the Gaffer thankfully they had their required effect as Almaty came out storming in the second half. Alex “Ballack” O’Donovan broke through and finished well to give Almaty the lead for the first time in the game. Espey then came up trumps with an absolute rasper from the right touchline.
Almaty then made things difficult for themselves when That’s Entertainment’s keeper speculatively hit a long-ball up the field; the ball then got a headed flick-on and sailed up (at least to a height of 7ft) over “Seaman” Sweetnam and then dropped into the goal (2ft high goal). Almaty regained their two goal cushion with another classy goal from Espey.
UPDATE:
Here's a crude representation of the above events...
With a minute left on the clock, a rush of blood to the head saw Spratt give away a penalty for handball. Idiot! The penalty was converted. Almaty kicked-off and the ball was played back to Spratt who managed to lose possession but Sweetnam saved well to prevent a catastrophe.
In a post match interview, Johnny “T” was asked was he disappointed not to add to his tally of goals and to explain how he missed an open goal from one yard out: “F*ck, I’m sh*t an b*llox unselfish p*nis player”.
League leaders, Viscount, earned three points as they were awarded a walkover. Almaty could be regretting leaking five goals as their goal difference was narrowed. Two games to go!
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